Yesterday I was at the dentist and found out that I have a lot of holes in my teeth, last time I was at the dentist I didn’t have any I think the dentist said I some starting to form. it was a shock. My grandma my dad’s mom (farmor) she was a dentist and I respected her a lot and for some reason I just feelt like I let her down. After the appointment I was in shock and tried to call my mom but she was just starting an exercise class. I called my husband and try to calm down but it didn´t work. Luckily there was a church near, I went in and the first I saw was where you could light candles, sit and pray. I light the candle and right as I was going to sit down the other person there went. I saw down and just cried and cried. I feelt disepontment in myself and how could it get to this point. And I miss my grandma so much she was so strong and had such a fight in her. I aspire her a lot. As I sat there a women came and huged me and asked what happed and I just said I miss my grandma. After the hug I felt a lot better, I thanked her and said it meant a lot to me. I want and bought flowers and as soon as I came home I made up the alter I do for my grandma for Día de muertos. Is very early for it but I just waned to feel connected. I don’t know why it drained me so much but today I just felt so tired. I have eaten a very late breakfast and I will make a dinner soon,

When I think about food I get worried one because I don´t have the same appetite as I used to and we don´t have enough money. I have for the last year had the same bugget and is been enough but when I go and weekly order is the dubble and we don´t have that kind of money. Tomorrow I will ask my mother and I feel like is so hard to ask because I have had made it without asking and now 3 months in a row I have to ask.

I saw a video from Jonas Lindberg and hes a Specialist nurse and a healthcare nurse. He said that the prarametics found a person. behind a house because they haven’t taken their medication for their chronic heart and vascular disease because they can’t pay for them and haven’t taken them for two weeks. 1 July they change the high-cost protection for pharmaceuticals to SEK 3,800. And I feel hear every day there are mistreatment at unseeing homes or home care. It breaks my heart who could ever treat such a human that way. I feel a sorrow for the old people being is such a vulnerable place and haven’t got the ways to change what’s happening to them.